“You STILL Don’t Have a Dog?!”

“Have I missed a blog?” asked Marcia in an e-mail.  And from Bernice:  “Didn’t get your blog this week?”

The fact is, I haven’t posted since May 17th — and there’s a reason for it.  In recent weeks I’ve sensed the patience of my friends and followers wearing thin as I continue to . . . deliberate.  “Oh Hank, get it over and get that beagle pup that you have been secretly thinking about,” Mary urged.  Linda admonished me to “live on the edge and rescue a puppy of unknown parentage from a shelter.  You can have fun obsessing over what it is.”  Obsessing being the operative word.

What I’m getting from my “public” is that it was okay to grieve, and then to ponder, and then to research.  But enough already!  Let’s get on with it!

But remember me?  The one who wrote Accept My Kid, Please!  A Dad’s Descent Into College Application Hell?  The one who tacked to his wall a two-foot-by-three-foot “war board” to organize and rate the 36 colleges and universities he deemed suitable for his son?  The one who also created a similarly sized “companion grid” to chart that son’s admissions progress at each of these 36 schools?  No one’s ever called me “Mr. Spontaneity.”  Just drop by the shelter and come home with the most lovable pup?  That’s not how the Beagle Man rolls . . .

Thus, the bulging files on all breeds under consideration (14 at last count).  And my plans to check out at least five different area shelters.  And house visits to friends specifically in order to “spend time” with their dogs:  Luke the German Shepherd; Gustav the Norwegian Buhund; Chief the Husky; Dante the Beagle.  And my new habit of jumping off my bike and accosting dog owners to interview them about their pets, both here in Westport (the Cavalier in front of Elvira’s; the Golden on Beachside; the Westie at Compo) and out in Montauk (the Cocker in front of Jack’s Coffee; the Border Collie-Australian Cattle Dog mix on Main Street; the German Shepherd on Bluff Road; the Husky at Cyril’s Fish House).

So for those of you — okay, all of you — who think I’m making this harder than it has to be . . yeah, maybe.  But there are certain difficulties.  As I’m sure you’ve gleaned, I like German Shepherds.  Carol has said, “Over my dead body.  Under no circumstance will I even remotely consider having a German Shepherd in our house.”  So I don’t think she agrees with me, entirely.

Also:  Knowing there’s a fair chance that in Future Dog’s lifetime, we’ll be living in NYC at least part of the year, I asked a realtor friend about restrictions on the size of dogs in New York apartments.  He e-mailed back:  “Under 25 lbs is good, under 20 is better, and under 10 is best.”

“Looks like we won’t be getting one of the large breeds,” said Carol.

“Looks like we won’t be living in New York,” said Beagle Man.

So this could take a while.

LOOK FOR A NEW BEAGLE MAN POST EVERY THURSDAY.  OR PRETTY CLOSE TO THURSDAY.  COULD BE WEDNESDAY.  OR FRIDAY.  LET’S NOT GET TOO OBSESSIVE HERE . . .  OH, AND BTW, YOU CAN ALSO FOLLOW ME ON FACEBOOK AND TWITTER