Maybe it was something I ate, but I wasn’t myself the whole weekend. I couldn’t seem to hold it in, and I peed on the carpet in the living room, the ping pong room . . . pretty much everywhere. Mrs. Beagle Man was beside herself, literally screaming at B-Man: “And you’re actually thinking of getting another dog?! Well, it’ll be all yours!” I felt bad about the carpets, but I have to admit, it was pretty funny watching Mrs. B go nuts. So on Sunday my friends Frankie & Roxy come over, and I wink at Frankie as he waddles in. He’s a dachshund, and we hounds stick together. Next thing you know, he takes a whiz right next to the foosball table! Poor Mrs. B has to act
like it’s no big deal, because Frankie’s “company,” but I can tell she’s boiling. Then, while she gives Hal and Carole a tour of the house, Frankie poops in the master bedroom! By now Hal and Carole and B-Man and Mrs. B are tripping all over each other for the Nature’s Miracle and the paper towels . . . and Roxy slips away for a stealth pee by the Franklin stove. The grown-ups clean that one up, sit down for lunch, and I can’t resist: I poop right next to the dining room table! OMG, Frankie and Roxy and I almost died laughing. Those two are the best. I’m gonna have to have them over more often.
The Roof Rack Report (#roofrackreport on Twitter, for those who follow me already on @BeagleManHank) appears on Mondays, usually. It’s about politics, travel, food . . . important stuff like that.
Hysterical! And all true!
Dear Ricky and Friends, you’re not helping the “let’s talk Dad into getting a dog” cause here at the Gau house.
Hey Ricky, It clearly sounds like you and your buddies, Frankie and Roxy, had a blast, but I strongly urge that you ease up a bit on poor Mrs. BM. I kind of feel for her. Think of this, she just raised three boys and probably figured all the heavy lifting is over, but yet, she has two more “boys” hanging out at home….you and BM. 20 years or so of cleaning the messes growing human boys leave around can wear a woman down. Now she still has BM and his extended adolescence and you to look after. In our house we had three daughters, so my wife had it easy. We tried a boy Bichon, but poor Beau got run over after 4 months….I said the next dog has got to be a girl and Beau’s younger sister, Mary. was with us for 17 years. I know it is macho to burp and pee on the floor, but if you have to, stick with that nice Mexican tile floor in the picture….much easier for Mrs. BM to clean.