Come on, all dogs embarrass their owners — at least sometimes. As they say on those Geico commercials, “it’s what they do.” I, for one, used to eat my own poop. Go ahead, judge me . . . though you really shouldn’t knock it
till you try it. The fact is, even the little red duck dog, as Beagle Man is so fond of calling him — that strikingly handsome, incredibly smart, impressively athletic, surpassingly social, thoroughly wonderful creature — has a quirky little habit: He mistakes humans for fire hydrants. Shall I say this more directly? He pees on people. Not every day. Not every week. But every other month or so, I’ve seen him lift his leg and water the jeans of some unsuspecting, unfortunate dog park habitué. It’s almost always the same story: Kemba drops ball at feet of stranger. Stranger, engaged in conversation, doesn’t notice ball — or Kemba. Kemba pees on stranger’s leg. Is this our duck dog sending a message — “You don’t throw to me, I’ll pee on your jeans”? No, that wouldn’t be Kemba; that’s more a vindictive, beagle thing — something I might have done. I think he’s just like, “I dropped the ball and that tall thing isn’t throwing it?? Hmm . . . must be a tree.” Whizzz. I wish I could show you a photo of this, but I don’t have one, because whenever it happens, the B-Man quietly drifts away and pretends he has nothing to do with young Kemba. But trust me. The K-Dawg really does this. I wouldn’t lie to you.
The Roof Rack Report used to appear regularly on Mondays. Now it appears once in a blue moon, when Beagle Man deigns to give me some space . . .
Oh, boy, Ricky. That IS a dark (and funny) secret – well, to those of us who don’t frequent Kemba’s dog park. And here I have been thinking how terrible it is that my female puppy is occasionally still peeing in excitement when greeting people!
I love the juxtaposition of the regal painting of Kemba and his dirty secrets being out in the open, or more aptly on a pair of jeans.