DOGS WHO LOVE PEOPLE WHO HATE DOGS

Eleven years ago, Ricky the Beagle wrote a post (“The Odd Couple”) making fun of Kemba, who seemed to be spending a lot of time and energy

cozying up to Joe, Beagle Man’s friend, who is not what you’d call a “dog person.”  Kemba was just a puppy at the time, but he’s now almost 12, and he’s still banging his head against the wall, trying to befriend humans who would just as soon be left alone.

I brought this up last month at a writing workshop I lead, asking the others if they’d had any similar experience with dogs being drawn to people who can easily do without them.  One of them, Barbara, said:

We got our first family dog when our three boys were 9 months, 31/2 and 6.  We were living in El Paso, Texas a long way from our Eastern City families and home.  Jack [Barbara’s husband] had just been uprooted at age 35 from his first job and our first home to serve during the Vietnam War.  A dog seemed to me just the thing to make the boys feel at home and have something to love. I wanted one desperately.  Jack, a “New York City” boy who had never had a dog, wanted NO part of another member of the household for whom he had responsibility. 

We, of course, got a dog, a rescue whom we called Simon.  Simon attached himself to Jack and would not leave his side.  The rest of us loved and played with Simon, but Jack, who paid no attention to him, whatsoever, was Simon’s only real buddy: He’d cling to Jack whenever Jack was at home, and would sleep under his desk all the time.

Joanne chimed in:

My sister lives with me, and Teddy LOVES her.  In turn, she tolerates him. I don’t know what it is — she’s not giving him treats on a regular basis or taking him out for walks or rides, but he gets so excited when he knows she’s gotten home, he grabs a bone and shakes his whole body like he’s having convulsions. She says hi to him and keeps walking — unless she sees me, and then she feigns affection.

And Julie:

My friend Mike’s dogs enthusiastically like to bring me and our friend Peter (who is unequivocally a cat person) their toys that are chewed up and slimy with saliva. They proceed to beg for attention and seem to never tire of having the toys thrown across the yard. My shoulder does wear out, however.  And Peter refuses to even touch the toys. The last time we were at Mike’s house and the dogs were not able to engage Peter or me with the slimy play, they just sat near my feet and licked my legs.

So Kemba, it tuns out, is not The Lone Proselytizer.  To see if there was any particular reason for this particular dog behavior, I turned — of course! — to AI (whose reply comes principally from Modern Dog Magazine):

Dogs are highly social animals that monitor group dynamics. If three people in a room are showering the dog with attention and one person is completely ignoring them, the dog views that indifferent person as a puzzle to solve. They will put extra effort into “winning over” the one holdout in the room. 

And Joe, you’re the lucky one.

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