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ENOUGH ALREADY!

Posted on by Hank
sniff
The world’s most scintillating blade of grass

It’s no secret that I’m not good at training dogs.  The funny part of this, though, is that a lot of people we run into think Kemba is extremely well behaved.  They’re impressed that he’ll drop a ball at your feet after retrieving it.  That he’ll come when he’s called.  (Mostly.)  That he doesn’t wander far from me when we go hiking. This behavior, I believe, comes from 1.) understanding each other (we’ve been together for more than nine years), and 2.) A smidge of early professional training.  Unfortunately, though, through my own lack of discipline and follow-through, I’ve managed to un-teach a lot of those learned behaviors.

As I mentioned in a post back in July (“Bad Habit”), Kemba’s trainer had told me that if I didn’t reinforce the rule of my dog always walking on my left, or always walking on my right when we leash-walk, he’d continually drag me from one side of the street to the other.  And I’d regret it.  But I didn’t (reinforce.)  And he does (drag me from side to side).  And I do (regret it).

But there’s another habit that’s even more annoying: the never-ending sniffing.  Kemba’s trainer taught him the “heel” command, which is supposed to keep him walking forward alongside me.  And he learned it.  But my thinking was, what’s the harm in letting him sniff a little here and there?  Our walk is his time.  Let him enjoy it.  So I eased up on that one, too.

Big mistake.  The result is that now he’ll stop and sniff every effing thing!  First, we have to pause and inspect a fossil bagel fragment that somebody dropped maybe a month ago.  Five steps later, it’s a small decapitated frog squished by a car overnight.  Okay, I can see the promise that both these morsels might hold for a dog.  But then he’ll pause and hover, nose to the ground, over a patch of grass.  Forever!  And I’m thinking, What the hell can possibly be that interesting???!!!  What else can he conceivably learn from that grass?  I yank his leash to get him going again, but no.  We can’t move on until he lifts his leg and pees on that fascinating turf.

A post by Gemma Johnstone on the American Kennel Club website posits that dogs stopping to sniff is their version of social media.  That they’re “gathering vital intel about their territory and four-legged neighbors.  Whether it’s discerning the scent of a male rival, a notification that a bitch is in heat, or that a critter they’d like to chase took a pause in that spot . . .”  Fair enough.  I’ll jump online from time to time when I get pinged and stop over an interesting tidbit.  But then I move on.  I don’t dwell on it forever.  And I certainly don’t feel the need to pee on my iPhone when I’m done.

Seems to me what Kemba and I need is a little old-fashioned compromise.  I need to be a bit more patient when he stops to sniff.  And he needs to be a bit more selective about his information sources.

YOU CAN ALSO FOLLOW BEAGLE MAN, KEMBA, AND RICKY ON FACEBOOK AND INSTAGRAM.



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