Two weeks ago, in his Roof Rack Report, Ricky exhorted everyone to stand up for Kemba’s
“Freedom of Beach.” Two weeks from now, Kemba has his day in court (see photo, bottom). While I vowed in my last post that I’d fight this $100 ticket to the end, even if it cost me $1,000 in court fees, I’m no longer feeling quite so bullish about the outcome. Sure, even though I boasted about my recent string of Perry Mason-esque successes (old-school reference; sorry) in my traffic/parking cases in Vermont, Oregon, and California, the confidence of Beagle Man, Esq., took a big hit last week when the Oregon win was overturned. Seems the parking receipt I used as Exhibit A was not the one for the alleged street-parking violation on Southwest Broadway between Franklin and Salmon Streets in Portland, OR, but was instead from Stall #73 of a public parking lot at Pike Place Market in Seattle, WA. Needless to say, that weakened my case substantially.
Also, concerning our August 24 date at East Hampton Town Justice Court? It’s not really right for me to ask my daughter-in-law, Kelly, the one who was actually given the ticket, to take a day off from work. (I would ask her — but my wife says I can’t.) Ditto my niece Sarah, an attorney, who kind of volunteered to provide legal representation for Team Kemba. And while I know that I, with my two months of law school, could dazzle the courtroom, I’ve been told that only Kelly or an actual lawyer can appear on Kemba’s behalf.
Given the above, here are the actions I propose:
1. Let’s start a virtual petition. Just hit the
“comment” icon all the way at the bottom of this post — it’s at the end of the row that begins with the Facebook icon — and write a short statement: “I think Kemba should be allowed to run free on the beach because ———————————”
2. Make prints of the “Free Kemba!” poster (top right) and plaster them everywhere.
3. Start using the #freekemba! hashtag on all social media. I have no idea what this could possibly accomplish, but what the hell?
4. If you’re an attorney and would be willing to offer your services pro bono to represent Kemba and Kelly in court, please make yourself known a.s.a.p. to the Beagle Man.
5. Show up in droves outside the East Hampton Town Justice Court on the 24th, posters and placards a-waving, chanting “Free Kemba before Septemba!”
Kemba’s first birthday is coming up this Thursday, August 13. Let’s give him back the beach as his b-day present!
LOOK FOR A NEW BEAGLE MAN POST EVERY THURSDAY. OR PRETTY CLOSE TO THURSDAY. COULD BE WEDNESDAY. OR FRIDAY. LET’S NOT GET TOO OBSESSIVE HERE . . . OH, AND BTW, YOU CAN ALSO FOLLOW ME ON FACEBOOK, TWITTER, AND INSTAGRAM.
I think Kemba should be allowed to run free on the beach because of the Canadian-American Reciprocity Treaty of 1854. This historical document obviously paved the way for Kemba’s dual citizenship status. The responsibilities of citizens include: Respecting the rights and freedoms of others and eliminating discrimination and Injustice. It is therefore incumbent on Kemba and/or his representatives to preserve his rights and freedoms.
Hear, hear!
I think Kemba should be allowed to run freely on the beach because, well…he’s Kemba! Now I know you Hampton types always have celebrities hanging out in your parts, but Kemba is special! He’s known and has friends all over the U.S. of A. and internationally, he’s VERY well behaved, and, most importantly, EVERYONE loves Kemba! Even those he meets on the beach fall in love with him instantaneously. In fact, if you’re looking for more tourists to spend LOTS of money in your town, just make it known that Kemba can be found roaming the beach. Economically, this will return lots more money to your coffers than one lousy little fine!
Right on, Langdon!